Where animals in stories get to be the heroes, villains, or lazy afternoon protagonists. But written really poorly.
Bad Animal Poetry: Tall Birds Edition
Hello and welcome to my first installment of Bad Animal Poetry. This week I will be talking about tall birds who love running, flaunting their feathers, or doing both at the same time. I suppose that’s what one does when you have tall legs or just love shouting nonstop at other birds. Anyway I’m not…
Bad Animal Poetry: Tailed Primates
I always assumed that there were some animals that had it rougher than others when it comes to their sleeping cycles. But then there are some who just love hopping around during the day while listening to their favorite Imagine Dragons songs. Living their lives like they’re the ones who can cut in line with…
Bad Animal Poetry: Big Lizards
On this week’s Bad Animal Poetry I will be showcasing several lizards who look like they might have radioactive breath of a different sort. Since I am a big ‘Godzilla’ fan and his titular movie, ‘Godzilla: King of the Monsters’, is already out I thought I would write something to coincide with its release. Although…
Bad Animal Poetry: Frustrated Frogs
If there is ever an amphibian who either looks grumpy or feels incredibly neutral about what it is doing — then it’s the frog. Some days it eats flies and sits in one spot waiting for the next one. Other days it eats more flies and slightly moves to the right. A frog carries one…
Bad Animal Poetry: Sad Salamanders
Some can relate to an animal who resembles an athlete after being accused of taking performance enhancing drugs. Sweating nonstop and either looking too calm or on the verge of darting out of a room. However inside each Salamander is melancholia, the true relatable link to humanity. Listen, you (way more enlightened reader) possibly know…
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